Female leadership: 7 questions - and honest answers

In September, I stepped into my first senior leadership role. I had been a very good teacher for 10 years, and felt ready for this step.

I had worked in some of the best schools in the region, and knew my knowledge of teaching and learning was excellent, so I was confident that this new challenge would go as positively as my teaching career had.

But the reality was very different.

The skills I had developed in my teaching career had not fully prepared me for this new role, and my knowledge of pedagogy and practice didn’t necessarily translate to the administrative and operational issues I was tasked with resolving on a daily basis.

It dawned on me how solitary the teaching profession is: despite having spent the last decade in a room of 30 little people, I didn’t actually know how to lead a room full of adults.

In short, I wasn’t very “good” at it. My confidence took a nosedive, and I started to feel like every achievement in my career to date must have been some kind of coincidence.

Lessons from female leaders

After some soul-searching, and tough love from my respected mentors, I started to believe I wasn’t as terrible at leadership as I thought I was, and that maybe other leaders had also felt this way when starting their own leadership journeys.

Keen to find out, I interviewed several female leaders from across international education. Below, I’ve selected a key question and answer from each interview:

1. Have any mistakes marked a turning point in your leadership journey?

Yes. There was a moment where I realised I was trying to lead by being perfect. This was exhausting for me and distancing for others.

The turning point was recognising that perfection creates barriers, while authenticity builds trust. This shifted how I show up: more human, more reflective and more connected.

Zara Harrington, school principal, BC Academy International School, Dubai

2. How do you maintain perspective when things get tough?

I’m not sure I’ve found the answer to this. When Ofsted is looming, it completely takes over, and all perspective is gone. Family can be a help at times like that, reminding you what really matters.

I’ve always found it sobering to think what will be written on my gravestone - it won’t be how well I did my job!

Sarah Griggs, ex-headteacher and leadership coach

3. What’s one myth about leadership you’d love to bust?

That great leaders are born. I believe that leaders develop and grow; there may be some inherent abilities, skills or character traits that some have and others do not, but that is about differences rather than strengths or weaknesses.

Leadership is a journey of growth and development. None of us is born with the answers.

Fiona Cottam, principal, Hartland International School, Dubai

4. How do you manage imposter syndrome?

When my inner critic shows up, I try to take a step back and look at the bigger picture. I sometimes imagine myself disappearing from my role in a “big puff of smoke” scenario, and ask, “Would both campuses still function?” The answer is yes, and that’s actually reassuring.

Stacey Scales, head of early years, The International School of Moscow, Russia

5. Can you share a time when something went wrong, and what you learned from it?

Early in my leadership journey, I became completely fixated on my to-do list. I was so focused on delivering outcomes, meeting deadlines and being efficient that I forgot the importance of simply checking in with people.

I assumed that visibility through action was enough, but over time I realised that some colleagues felt unseen and disconnected.

That experience taught me that leadership isn’t just about productivity; it’s about presence. I’ve learned to slow down, to make space for informal conversations and to ask how people are really doing before diving into what needs to be done. It shifted my mindset from managing tasks to leading people, and it’s become one of the foundations of my approach to compassionate leadership.

Laura Wild, assistant headteacher, Arcadia British School, Dubai

6. What would you say to your younger self about leadership?

Don’t be so hard on yourself. Accept the things you can’t change, don’t take things personally and don’t be afraid to be your authentic self. There’s a fantastic picture of a rhino with the strapline “I am a unicorn”. It’s a great reminder that we have to be resilient and fairly thick-skinned, but also able to create and spread the magic. Above all, to believe in ourselves.

Tracy Crowder-Cloe, school principal, Cranleigh Abu Dhabi

7. How has your leadership changed over time?

I have become much more patient. When you lead a large organisation, you quickly realise that the cogs in the wheel cause complexity and delay.

We sometimes need to step back, reflect and observe from a helicopter view to see where key points can be leveraged for optimum impact. Large organisations are heaving beasts that depend on many factors operating in tandem, and they do not move swiftly in most cases.

Dr Catherine O Farrell, CEO, Incluzun, Dubai

Stepping up and owning it

Stepping into leadership has challenged me in ways I never anticipated, and it has also reshaped how I view success, growth and resilience.

Listening to the experiences of other women in education has reinforced my conviction that leadership is not about having all the answers or being perfect. Instead, it is about learning, reflecting and having the courage to keep going, even when self-doubt creeps in.

Leadership is deeply human, and these shared stories highlight the power of connection, authenticity and continuous development. Leadership is an evolving journey, and it is one that requires patience, self-compassion and the confidence to grow into the role rather than expecting to arrive in it fully formed.

Ruby Fiddes is assistant headteacher at GEMS Founders School - Al Mizhar in Dubai