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And the next award goes to...

Which brings us to this year's Diary awards for gross linguistic turpitude and general obfuscation. Prize for Longest Set of Initials on Show goes to the GTCEDfESLEACPDPP (work it out), but we have a soft spot for the artful placing of "..." (for Independent) in the sexual-health advisory group SHIAG.

Best New Real Acronym is surely Cayac, the Welsh version of the new name for the secondary heads' organisation in Wales.

It has been another fine year for PR. Never mind the bad taste of using a child's murder to advertise a truancy-call system (you know who you are), how about a Prize for Bad Spelling? We liked "SYNTHETIC PHONICS EXHILIRATION" (sic) over a press release praising the Government's whole-hearted embrace of this way to teach reading. But this was more than equalled by a recent entry from Barclays Insurance Services with its doomed attempt to be seasonal. A press release revealing that 44 per cent of parents have suffered from children causing significant damage to their home bears the headline: "LITTLE ANGLES CAUSE DAMAGE IN THE HOME." The Diary Prize for Inventive PR should go to the Department for Education and Skills. Taxed with making the same announcement several times (on the extended school day) a spokesman blithely said: "We're an environmentally friendly department - we like to recycle."

The 2005 Diary Award for Obfuscation goes to Ofsted.

In a report on pupils' satisfaction in the summer, the following comment appears: "IIn just under one fifth of secondary schools, inspectors sense that satisfaction levels are no more than satisfactory."

Have a more than satisfactory Christmas.

Email us diary@tes.co.uk

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