The ba's on the slates, Mr Stodter

NO SENSE of practicalities, those loons from the Health and Safety Executive in Aberdeen. Perturbed at the number of kids falling through skylights and off flat school roofs during the summer holidays, they dispatched a stern warning to education chiefs.

In turn, John Stodter's directorate dispatched a stern warning to heads who similarly informed their staff. Keep off the roofs and any ball put up there stays put, they insisted.

A primary 3 teacher conveyed the tidings to her class. "Balls are going to stay there," she said.

"Fa says?" asked a young loon.

"Mr Stodter, the director of education."

"Fa's he, like?"

"He's in charge of all schools," replied the teacher.

The inquirer thought some more. "Is he going to come doon and get the ba's aff the roof for us?"

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