From media reports this week you’d think schools are actively promoting harm. Reporting on an inquiry by the women and equality committee in Parliament on sexual harassment and sexual violence in school, The Telegraph said MPs heard that “sexist name calling and lifting skirts is ignored in some schools because some still regard sexism as acceptable behaviour”.

Even an NUT representative was critical. Rosamund McNeil, the union’s head of education and equality, urged government to issue guidance to schools, which must “understand that sexism is as important as racism and the harm and negative consequences are just as serious as racist stereotypes”.

Meanwhile, Susie McDonald, chief executive of healthy relationships charity Tender, complained: “Many teachers are victim-blaming at the moment. They are looking at sexual harassment as horseplay or something that’s just going on in the corridors.” And Ofsted’s Jane Millward said teachers were not reporting low-level sexual harassment against girls, thus creating a culture where it is “seen as the norm”.

Yes, we have an enormous problem with sexual harassment and sexism in society at large: and society is mirrored within the small communities of schools. As Ms McNeil said: “We have a country where we still have high levels of rape and sexual harassment because unfortunately we haven’t won the battle that all of this is sexism and all of this is unacceptable.”

I fear that, whereas many children nowadays will not dream of using racist language, there isn’t the same taboo concerning sexist terms. But are schools really doing so badly?

Teachers cannot oversee student behaviour every second of the day (though some try): but I can’t imagine the teachers I mix with, not just in my school, simply ignoring blatant sexual harassment of girls when they see it - or even suspect it.

Society is ambivalent about this. Sexism creeps into schools from outside. Parents, too, may abhor racist abuse, but some I have had to deal with, having disciplined their child for using offensive sexual language, have suggested that I’m overreacting over “mere words”.

I’ve no doubt that we need to do more, though I’m surprised by someone from a teaching union requesting more government guidance: schools are drowning under the stuff.

‘Don’t blame us for all society’s ills’

In short, it’s probably true that teachers need more skill, confidence and, therefore, training in dealing with issues around sexual harassment: government should provide it. It should be of the highest quality, hard-hitting and intelligent, not the usual low-level, banal rubbish that accompanies every new government agenda. And then schools need the time and funding for training and for implementing the strategies that result.

Schools should not be blamed for society’s ills. Even a recent call for parenting lessons from government included a sideswipe at schools. John Ashton, outgoing president of the Faculty of Public Health, proclaimed (to quote The Times) that “parents needed help to prevent the next generation being crippled by conditions such as anxiety, anorexia and obesity. One in 10 children has a mental health problem, and a poor relationship with parents is among the main causes.”

We might well agree with this, though his reason for demanding state intervention was unhelpful: today’s young people, Professor Ashton asserted, are being neglected by “sweatshop” schools as well as by bad parents.

Well, thanks. It’s our fault again, apparently.

I’m not wallowing in a slough of victimhood. I just don’t accept the caricature of ineffectual teachers consciously ignoring sexual harassment: and I don’t recognise our schools as sweatshops.

Nonetheless, teachers are under pressure, school leaders are suffering the cosh of floor-targets and inspection: of course pressure is sometimes passed on to children (hence the sweatshop crack), and teachers just don’t have the time or energy to be always out on the corridors, spotting wrong behaviours and intervening to stop them.

Schools are, and should be, a microcosm of society. That means they have to deal with the community’s intractable problems as well as its strengths and joys.

But give them a break. They’re doing their best: less blame and a lot more support would go a long way to helping them do the job that’s too often required of them - curing in miniature the sicknesses of a greater society.

Dr Bernard Trafford is headteacher of Royal Grammar School, Newcastle upon Tyne, and a former chairman of the HMC. The views expressed here are personal. He tweets at @bernardtrafford

Want to keep up with the latest education news and opinion? Follow TES on Twitter and like TES on Facebook