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Holy trinity

JACQUI Smith has admitted to joining the rest of the population in the pursuit of the new religion sweeping the Western world.

At a recent children's charity event a former headteacher George Varnava, was heard explaining the causesof the breakdown of modern society. He argued that it was inevitable if the only agenda for life we provide for our children was that of shopping, leisure and sex.

The education minister replied: "Well, I like shopping".

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