"An OFSTED inspection - really you shouldn't have! How did you guess that, after a 15-week term, working 60 hours-a-week, that was just what I wanted?
Actually (and I hope you don't mind me saying this) I was
hoping for something a little more original this year. After all, didn't you get me an OFSTED two years ago, and - now I come to think about it - two years before that?
In fact, as a present, it shows some lack of imagination on your part.
After we had doubled our exam results in three years and been named one of the 100 most improved schools in the country, I was rather hoping ou'd remember that pound;2,000 we talked about.
Still, not to worry. I've told the kids that their Christmas theatre trip is off and so I'm sure I'll soon have all that paperwork arranged in nice neat boxes. So thoughtful of you to cut the notice time down to six weeks - it really doesn't leave us time to worry, does it?
So, dear Mr Blunkett, I'll be thinking of you this Christmas. Oh yes, and while we're on the subject, have I told you about my New Year's resolution? It's to get a job at the DFEE. I gather that they're committed to a 35-hour working week. Now that's what I call progress!"
30 Embassy House
West End Lane
Kilburn, London NW6