This week: snogging at the NUT conference
Perhaps we should start by simply letting the facts speak for themselves: a couple were told off on Monday for snogging on the balcony of the NUT conference hall.
Yup. Snogging. At the NUT. The tonguing trade unionists, if you will.
If only for giving new meaning to the word "sad", the unnamed pair shall be sent forthwith to the TES Naughty Step. But not together. Separate Naughty Steps, of course, for the sake of decency, even if an NUT spokesman insisted that there were "no lewd acts".
The couple were also on the receiving end of a verbal dressing down at the time of their misdemeanour from incoming president Marilyn Harrop - the conference's chair - for behaving in a "manner unbecoming to the union".
"I don't know if it was because they are bored or fired up by the debate, but no more please," she told delegates. A special mention must go therefore to Ms Harrop for believing that day four of an NUT conference might be in any way arousing.
One thing is certain - the union's conference department must be ordered to trawl eBay for a 1970s-style "No Heavy Petting" sign in time for the annual get-together next year. We definitely don't want any repeats.