Thinking of a present for people you don’t know well is a bore. Traditionally, a present says something about you, something about them and something about the relationship between you both.

Gift tokens, for example, say “I have no idea what you want but here, have some slightly less useful money.” 

And there is a circle of hell for people who give Simpsons-themed gifts. A simple note saying “I hate you” will suffice.

But there’s one gift every teacher, pupil and school would be thrilled to find in their sooty stockings: better behaviour.

It sounds like I’m offering you the tangerine, but it’s really this year’s must-have. So retro, yet so current.

Of course, if you asked many teachers what they really wanted they’d say: “Five goddamn minutes. Why are you asking me all these questions? I have 200 books to triple mark in case Ofsted come in six months.’

And it only happens if we make it happen. Waiting for classes to spontaneously “be good” is as likely as hoping mice will tidy your kitchen.

Some balk at the idea we need to direct children (and that attitude is part of the reason we sometimes have problems, I think); the interior space of someone’s mind is their sanctum, and we tread carefully if we tread there at all.

But presuming that we have a right to co-direct pupil behaviour is at the heart of what we do.

One reason behaviour management has struggled in popularity is that it is often so narrowly interpreted.

Behaviour is the sum of how people act. Somewhere along the line in schools that became associated solely with things like “not talking” and “not fighting”.

But behaviour encompasses everything students do - every interaction, every turn of a page, every visit to the library made or delayed.

And, as adults who care about their wellbeing, it is our business to care about what they do. We need to get rid of the idea that good behaviour is simply the absence of bad behaviour. The latter I call negative good behaviour (and I’m borrowing loosely from Isaiah Berlin’s negative and positive concepts of liberty).

This is still important. You want pupils to refrain from loads of poor behaviours, and in schools where behaviour is described as challenging these are the kind of behaviours you need to work hard to bin.

Incentivising good behaviour

Noisy, rowdy rooms where pupils insult each other and bite their thumbs at the stiff at the front are hell to try to lead. So we want them to stop doing all that.

At first many students won’t do it out of the goodness of their hearts, so we need to incentivise them.

Experience tells us that for many students, a range of rewards and sanctions, cleverly used, can have a large effect on many poor behaviours.

We present the students with a simple calculation every time they consider shouting out how bored they are: are the consequences worth it?

Is there a greater gain to be made elsewhere? For entities as undoubtedly egoistic as we are, calculated benefits (or their loss) matter a lot.

Of course there are many more strategies than these (although these are nothing to be sneezed at - the art of rewarding and sanctioning routinely, proportionally, fairly, is a project requiting great stamina and sensitivity, not some bully’s charter or soppy Santa’s grotto of happy thoughts).

All of these aim to their own extinction; you sanction so that the sanctions deter, and sanctions are needed less and less. The ultimate aim is “no need for sanctions”, not “no sanctions”.

Other important strategies that need to be considered are: discovering the causes of poor behaviour, and dealing with those pathologies with gusto.

That doesn’t mean excusing inappropriate conduct - far from it - we need to help students to realise that they need to try to be kind and sociable despite difficulties, but as a practical strategy it’s hard to beat.

There are so many ways to modify behaviour. Role models, language, school culture, home involvement, use of external agencies…

Then there are other behaviours that I call positive good behaviour. These are habits that exceed the mere demand that we choose not to be mean or destructive; they are habits of excellence that, if cultivated, add to each pupil’s lives in immeasurable ways.

Good habits of study; the ability to communicate fluidly and fluently, with confidence; manners and altruistic behaviour; ways to use libraries.

And this is something that even Aristotle knew: you cannot directly influence someone’s character - unless you are the X-Men’s Charles Xavier. But you can insist that pupils act a certain way.

Those actions become habits. And “that which we habitually do”, is a pretty good definition of what we mean by character. The actions become internalised, portable and have the potential to blossom permanently in the hearts and actions of those whom we teach.

That is a very great gift indeed.

So, first you need to achieve buy-in, or some could call it compliance. It’s a necessary stage; this compliance then becomes intelligently internalised until it needs only the lightest touch to reactivate as a habit in the student.

Then we work on the positive behaviours, with all of our students. Some people seem to think this enslaves students, when the opposite is true; it liberates them from the selfish impulses and instincts that lead to short term goals and long term car crashes.

Who is more free; the student who is permitted to swear at peers, leave lessons when they feel like it, and not study, or the student who has been taught to work hard, be kind, do well? If freedom means “more choices in life”, then I know which one I prefer, by miles.

Of course, all students enter this continuum at different points. Some pupils are heavy with social and cultural capital, raised in civility and respect for the dignity of others.

Others aren’t so lucky, and the cradles of their character have been characterised by chaos.

We take them all, and we help them all. It’s this variety that leads some to unwisely think behaviour is a cinch, or that it isn’t a big deal and needs little focus.

If you have been fortunate enough to teach only well-regulated children of charm, it is easy to imagine that calm conduct is achieved merely by the raise of an eyebrow or an avuncular chuckle.

I’ve been lucky enough to see many, many schools that create brilliant behaviour cultures and the results in their children are phenomenal. It’s the gift you unwrap your whole life. 

Merry Christmas.

Tom Bennett has been a teacher in the East End of London for 10 years. Currently, he is the director and founder of researchED, a grassroots, teacher-led project that aims to make teachers research-literate and pseudo-science proof