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Private Goblin

SPEAKING of technology, a middle-aged man known only as the "Red Goblin" has been forming online relationships with children at a Birmingham primary. But fear not, the Goblin is in fact the esteemed Professor Tim Brighouse, the Government's favourite chief education officer.

He has forged an e-relationship with pupils,acting as a virtual tutor to help them with spelling and grammar. Brighouse, a mate of the school's headteacher, is a firm believer in using e-mail to help raise standards. Perhaps this is one of the "private interests" he last week told teachers that they should confess to pupils to help raise their self-esteem.

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