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Soundbites

A worried teaching assistant approaches the head: "Just in case you get a complaint from Jemima's mother. She said I swore, and I did not.All I said was, 'Now where's my flipchart?'"

A Year 3 pupil was answering a class questionnaire about working conditions. "Where do you have to work hardest?"

"In the ICT sweat."

BOB ASTON, KENT

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