Secondary partner: Gently whisper “redistribution of money” to your smug HE crony

Secretarial courses: Sorry, we know that GNVQ makes them sound like nuclear physics with a dollop of brain surgery

Sector performance indicator: By mid-term the head of sector should have had her 13th psycho-drama

Self-assessment: At least someone wants to tell the inspector about your vision, resources and quality provision, even if it’s only you

Sensitivity analysis: Being careful who you talk to first thing on Monday morning

Skills shortage: But not in FE lecturing. We all know that anyone can just walk right in and sit right down beside the old overhead projector

Skills training: It’s your mission to ensure that everyone earns more money than you

Sole provider: Look, nobody else wanted to risk a course on patio weeding

Sponsorship: Why not charge Calvin Klein and Nike for their global penetration of our classrooms?

Staff development officer: No one knows the number of stress management courses she’s overseen

Staffing: A moveable feast? Strategic plan operating statement: Attempts to translate the vision statement into basic Klingon

Stress management: Don’t look at Alec like that, he’s only fiddling with his solar plexus

Student diversity: Save the free mobile phones for when you’re really desperate

Sub-degree work: Lord Denning says know your limits; he does

Super-quango: Your principal is boasting about his size again