On the basis that there should be several hundred new probationary teachers devouring these pages, we reckon it's time to trawl out the hoary old tale of a school rector in a bygone age who went seeking his principal teacher of home economics, in the days when such creatures were still extant throughout the Scottish education system.
He entered her room to witness a group of boys collapsed in uproarious glee. Investigation revealed that the aforementioned teacher had gone into the store cupboard and was about to initiate the distribution of handcraft materials. Hence the proclamation that had heralded the post-pubescent outburst: "Right! If any of youse boys want felt, come intae the cupboarda "