Trond Waage, the Norwegian children's ombudsman, regaled the recent ethos conference in Dunblane with tales of modern parenthood.
Picture the scene if youse wull (that's old Norse). A father and seven-year-old son are shopping in a busy supermarket. Father piles in healthy stuff and son stacks up with sweets and crisps.
A disgruntled dad puts the junk food back. Son breaks into a tantrum of tears, screeching and mayhem as he pulls tins, packets and bottles from the shelves.
Cut back to reflective father.
"Next time, use condoms."