English as she is wrot

21st May 2004 at 01:00
Latest metaphorical offering, we gather, from GCSE exam papers south of the border. Pick your favourite.

"The hailstones leaped from the pavements, just like maggots when you fry them in hot grease."

"She had a deep, throaty, genuine laugh, like that sound a dog makes just before it throws up."

"It was a working class tradition, like fathers chasing kids around with their power tools."

"She walked into my office like a centipede with 98 missing legs."

"It hurt the way your tongue hurts after you accidentally staple it to the wall."

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