From the forums - It's a new year ... but with the same old problems

7th January 2011 at 00:00
Chronologically challenged pupils, diabolical parking problems and some homicidal tendencies

Along with the art of letter-writing, telling the time seems to have fallen victim to the digital age, according to posters on The TES online staffroom.

Jet786 has students who admit they are unable to read analogue clocks (they're the ones with a face and hands, btw). As a result, the classroom clock is a mystery to them, she says, adding: "If it was not for the bell to start and finish classes, I swear some would not have a clue what to do."

It can lead to bizarre situations. At egyptgirl's school, pupils have to complete a form to go to the toilet during lessons, stating the time. When egyptgirl was filling out a form for one Year 11 boy in her class, she asked him to read the clock behind her. His response was surprising: "After a long pause, he said, 'The big hand is on the two and the little hand is on the eleven'."

For glitterkid, telling the time is a life-skill that should be taught by parents, although ResourceFinder wonders whether there is any point, now the world has gone digital. "We do not expect them to use a slide rule or even a cassette player," ResourceFinder says. "I never learnt how to use a mangle but my Mum could use one."

How long does parking a car have for this world? Impulce says she - some will be raising their eyebrows knowingly at this point - can drive quite happily, but struggles when it comes to parking, whether it is parallel, reverse or just plain straight forward. "I feel ashamed and like I'm letting women drivers down," impulce laments.

Countrybumpkin has to let random strangers get him - or indeed her - out of a parking space. "It's a good job my car is worth nothing because they could have just driven away," says this poor parker, while Lilyofthefield is brutally frank: "Once I put my car in reverse, I might as well just shut my eyes", which must come as some comfort to anyone behind her.

"Get a car with parking sensors," suggests lurk_much. Apart from the danger of falling into big holes, it takes the worry out of parking. Is there anything technology cannot do? Soon we will be getting robots to wipe our ... windscreens.

If there is one thing technology has not yet mastered, it is write a love song. Nedkelly wants to know the ones that get you blubbing. For him, it is "Love is All Around", as sung by Wet Wet Wet. But his choice does not meet with universal approval. "That song makes me want to kill," says coffeekid, with masterful understatement, while Lilyofthefield hates it "to the point that I'd have to turn the radio off if it came on". Fortunately, her mood lightens when Serdinya suggests the "Air That I Breathe" by the Hollies. "That little instrumental intro at the start does actually remind me of feeling immediately post-sex," she says. "That is probably far too much information so will stop now."

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