Hamsters to fill inspector holes

2nd January 2004 at 00:00
I just love your articles: schools with no teachers (TES, December 5); classroom assistants replaced by dogs (TES, November 28). Life would be so much duller if your office calendar was not permanently stuck on April 1!

Just in case inspiration ever runs out, may I suggest the following headlines to provide similar fantasies:

"Schools failing infants who don't learn double bass", lashes watchdog.

"Lobotomies for Year 6 children improves Sats scores", claims Ofsted.

"Government to balance budget by sending children down mines" "Train hamsters to beat Ofsted inspector shortage", urges RSPCA Or - daftest of all - "Ministers to value teachers in dramatic policy switch" Michael Hurdle 7 Farm Lane Send Surrey

Subscribe to get access to the content on this page.

If you are already a Tes/ Tes Scotland subscriber please log in with your username or email address to get full access to our back issues, CPD library and membership plus page.

Not a subscriber? Find out more about our subscription offers.
Subscribe now
Existing subscriber?
Enter subscription number

Comments

The guide by your side – ensuring you are always up to date with the latest in education.

Get Tes magazine online and delivered to your door. Stay up to date with the latest research, teacher innovation and insight, plus classroom tips and techniques with a Tes magazine subscription.
With a Tes magazine subscription you get exclusive access to our CPD library. Including our New Teachers’ special for NQTS, Ed Tech, How to Get a Job, Trip Planner, Ed Biz Special and all Tes back issues.

Subscribe now