Jotter - Take of to Beijjjing

14th August 2009 at 01:00

Surfing the web, pondering our next trip abroad, we stumbled across a posting from a Scottish pupil. She was going on an "educaitional" trip to Beijing this summer with her school.

Was the vegetarian food "eny" good, she wanted to know? And what was the "wether" like? In her next post, she apologises for any "confussion", going on to confess planes are not her favourite form of transport - "i amentt a good fligher at take of".

Maybe her Chinese is better than her English?

Weefee on wee s***

Some people feel quite strongly that teachers shouldn't fall in line with accountants and nurses by going through an MOT every few years, as the General Teaching Council for Scotland's Tom Hamilton told the recent leadership summer school in Edinburgh. The director of educational policy is a strong advocate of just that idea, and discovered the ire it could cause when he visited The TESS chatroom recently.

Amid the usual rational and measured debates came a rather pointed comment from one "weefee", whom he reckons is a would-be chartered teacher in the Highlands: "Tom Hamilton is a jumped-up little shit who hasn't taught for years."

"So there will be opposition," observed the GTC man dryly.

Well and truly captured

Retired art teacher Jill Smith probably looked like easy prey to Lloyd Talbot, the convicted criminal who snatched her handbag in a Bamp;Q car park.

Mr Talbot, however, learnt the hard way that the pen is mightier than the sword. Instead of describing Mr Talbot to the police, 71-year-old Mrs Smith drew a remarkable likeness from memory. The pensioner, who lives in Derwent-side, County Durham, captured Mr Talbot's nose, receding hairline and high cheekbones perfectly, and within two days he was caught. "He picked on the wrong person," she said. "It was hard luck on him really."

Winning movie formulas

Mathematical movie enthusiasts should Google "Maths teacher goes to the movies". Jotter can reveal the website's author as a (slightly obsessive) Scottish pedagogue, who includes "How's the maths?" ratings of recent releases. For the record, Star Trek scores well, but the latest part in the Hogwarts saga does not, so MTGTTM suggests a title for an extra forthcoming film: Harry Potter and the Curse of the Irreducible Quadratic Equation. Somehow, we don't see it catching on at Warner Bros.

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