* Overheard while walking to the playground.
Child A: "We're doing sex education next term."
Child B: "I know. I wonder where we'll be going for our trip."
* A young energetic teacher held us all spellbound after the summer break recounting brave tales of his adventures hiking and cycling through Africa. We were really impressed until one member of staff pointed to his neck collar and asked how he had sustained his injury.
"Oh that," he said nonchalantly "I ricked my neck drying my hair."
* I was discussing our impending harvest festival with my Year 5 literacy group. "Who do you think collects the food after the service to give it to less fortunate people?" Carl's hand shot up.
"The Starvation Army," he replied confidently.
We pay pound;30 for each Soundbite published. Send yours to Jill Craven, The TES, 66-68 East Smithfield, London E1W 1BX. Or email her at: email@example.com