A learning support assistant was conducting an intelligence test. One child was shown some pictures and asked to say what was missing. The first picture was of a door, with hinges, letterbox and number, but no handle. The assistant asked: "What's missing."
* When asked in the Year 4 QCA test why an author chose to write in direct peech, one child answered: "Because he was trying to be level four or more."
* A Year 6 set of CVs written in the role of Florence Nightingale threw up the following gem:
"I'm kind, caring, hard-working, helpful, generous and good at my gob."
Knowing the child in question, I couldn't have put it better myself.