A right royal panic is on at the John Niven Centre in Stranraer, one of Scotland's most lonely FE outposts. News has been received that no less a person than HM the Queen plans to visit on August 10.
Trial menus have already been sent to the Palace and the catering staff are up to high dough, making sure it will be all right on the day. But a small problem has arisen: August 10 is a Saturday, yet students will be required to tickle the royal palate.
Still, it's all very much in the spirit of the Royal Visit to Stranraer where plans for the Queen to open an extension to Stranraer Academy are also under consideration. The small problem here is that the contractors have gotten a little behind. Indeed, there is nothing but structural steelwork.
Local wags are suggesting that she be invited to fix a golden scaffolding pole to the unclad erection - after the lunch served by the non-existent students at the John Niven Centre.