I don't want to become the kind of teacher who... ends up talking to everyone they know as if they were kids in their class.
It made my day when... a notorious lad in my Year 9 class stayed behind at the end of a lesson in the fourth week to tell me that he was enjoying my lessons. "I hated English last year," he said, "but I'm getting it now."
Senior management don't know it, but ... my students each have one lesson every half-term when they can opt out. They choose when to use it and they can spend that lesson sitting quietly, reading, drawing or even sleeping.
Sometimes you need a break!
I couldn't keep a straight face when ... I bumped into one of my Year 8 girls at the supermarket. I usually wear a suit for school, and she was so surprised to see me in casual clothes that her jaw was literally on the floor. "Miss!" she laughed, pointing at me. "You're wearing jeans!"
I'm not looking forward to ... teaching sex education this year. Do I really have to demonstrate putting a condom on a banana?
I'd never live it down if... I admitted to my department that I have never actually read Macbeth. I rely 100 per cent on York Notes study guides.
I'd really like to tell the headteacher ... that a boy in my Year 12 class has a crush on him. I'm not sure how he'd react, though - so I just giggle about it to myself.
I honestly believe that ... teaching is the best job in the world. What other occupation allows you to rant on about your favourite subject all day?
At the beginning of the week I look forward to ... finding out the weekend's gossip from my form group. They definitely have a much more outrageous social life than I ever had.
My friends believe... that now I'm an English teacher I'm going to start wearing socks with sandals and tweed jackets with elbow patches. They're probably right - but I'll hold on to the jeans for a few years yet.
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