Were you paying attention?

2nd December 2005 at 00:00
1 A government watchdog is urging a crackdown on pupils plagiarising the web. What do the pupils say?

a I have never copied anything

b I have never copied anything

c I have never copied anything

d It wasn't me, it was my dad

2 Americans are being attacked by wild turkeys. What will happen next?

a Wild turkeys will be attacked by Americans

b Turkey will be attacked by wild Americans

c George Bush will find something about turkeys in Revelations

d George Bush will declare Thanksgiving to be a day of national revenge

3 Alcoholic mayhem has been predicted following the arrival of 24-hour licensing. What do teachers say?

a Better make this the last one, I've got assembly in ten minutes

b Better make this the last one, I've just seen a wild turkey attacking George Bush

c There just aren't enough hours in the day

d You're my very besht pupil in all the world

4 Rupert Murdoch claims he deserves more respect. What do journalists say?

a Help, I'm being attacked by a wild Rupert

b Yes Sir, how much?

c British journalism will never be the same again

d Same again, please

5 Jeffrey Archer wants to rejoin the Conservatives. What do decent law-abiding citizens say?

a I think he deserves more respect

b I think he deserves the whip

c I think he should be attacked by drunken wild Conservatives

d I'll have a large Archers with ice, please

ANSWERS: 1d, 2b, 3a, 4d, 5c

QUIZANSWERS: 1d, 2b, 3a, 4d, 5c

Log-in as an existing print or digital subscriber

Forgotten your subscriber ID?


To access this content and the full TES archive, subscribe now.

View subscriber offers


Get TES online and delivered to your door – for less than the price of a coffee

Save 33% off the cover price with this great subscription offer. Every copy delivered to your door by first-class post, plus full access to TES online and the TES app for just £1.90 per week.
Subscribers also enjoy a range of fantastic offers and benefits worth over £270:

  • Discounts off TES Institute courses
  • Access over 200,000 articles in the TES online archive
  • Free Tastecard membership worth £79.99
  • Discounts with Zipcar, Buyagift.com, Virgin Wines and other partners
Order your low-cost subscription today