1 Church of England leaders say that calling God "He" encourages wife-beating. What do archdeacons say?
a Calling God "She" leads to henpecking
b Calling God "It" is just storing up trouble
c At least I didn't turn mine into a pillar of salt
d And your point is?
2 Greece apparently became 25 per cent richer by including prostitution and money laundering in its GDP. What do the Greeks say?
a Greece expects every man to do his duty
b May I pay you with these nice new Euros?
d Domestic products don't come any grosser than this
3 A survey shows that 10 per cent of British men have paid for sex. What does this tell us?
a Ninety per cent of British men got lucky
b Ten per cent of British men visit Greece
c There's a shortage of British women
d They're just doing their bit for the GDP
4 The average Briton is twice as much in debt as the average European.
a Because the average Briton borrows twice as much money
b Greek prostitutes take plastic
c Anything Europeans can do, we can do better
d The average European is mean, thrifty, joyless and eats raw garlic
5 Primary pupils are being asked to act drunk as part of a drug awareness campaign. What do teachers think?
a I can do that
b Pity they can't act their age
c Can they act intelligent and hard-working as part of a teacher awareness campaign?
d Um, I don't think they're acting
QUIZ ANSWERS: 1d, 2a, 3b, 4a, 5c