Were you paying attention?

13th October 2006 at 01:00
1 Church of England leaders say that calling God "He" encourages wife-beating. What do archdeacons say?

a Calling God "She" leads to henpecking

b Calling God "It" is just storing up trouble

c At least I didn't turn mine into a pillar of salt

d And your point is?

2 Greece apparently became 25 per cent richer by including prostitution and money laundering in its GDP. What do the Greeks say?

a Greece expects every man to do his duty

b May I pay you with these nice new Euros?

c Eureka!

d Domestic products don't come any grosser than this

3 A survey shows that 10 per cent of British men have paid for sex. What does this tell us?

a Ninety per cent of British men got lucky

b Ten per cent of British men visit Greece

c There's a shortage of British women

d They're just doing their bit for the GDP

4 The average Briton is twice as much in debt as the average European.

Why?

a Because the average Briton borrows twice as much money

b Greek prostitutes take plastic

c Anything Europeans can do, we can do better

d The average European is mean, thrifty, joyless and eats raw garlic

5 Primary pupils are being asked to act drunk as part of a drug awareness campaign. What do teachers think?

a I can do that

b Pity they can't act their age

c Can they act intelligent and hard-working as part of a teacher awareness campaign?

d Um, I don't think they're acting

QUIZ ANSWERS: 1d, 2a, 3b, 4a, 5c

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