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Want to know a secret?

I knew I'd become a teacher when... it seemed normal to repeat my instructions at least 73 times. And still have people not noticing them.

My school is... one of the most innovative and energising places I've ever had the opportunity to work in.

I'm not looking forward to... academic review day (aka parents' evening for a whole day): the parents come and only meet their child's form tutor who has a list of all their grades. Not being a form tutor, I may be called to stand in and talk meaningfully about children I've never even met...

In five years' time I'd like to be... an advanced skills teacher running gifted and talented programmes nationally: these students are frequently undersupported and I want to help to change that.

If I had the guts I'd tell the head that... she's amazing. The school has already fully embraced the workforce reforms (no duties, no cover, PPA time and so on) and is piloting a radical staggered timetable with long lessons.

And, best of all, my timetable gives me one day a month off.

My worst work nightmare is... having a kid run round my classroom with a vacuum cleaner, another one spraying cleaning fluid around, and the rest sticking books to chairs, tables, the ceiling - all at the same time. It happened to a friend.

Senior management don't know it but... I've been known to teach in a sarong (and I'm male)I My favourite bit of the week is... my gifted and talented maths club - which hasn't actually happened yet, but when it does, I know it will be fabulous.

I hate teachers who... spend their time whingeing about how bad teaching is instead of getting themselves a life.

The weekend is for... spending time with my friends, relaxing, singing and partying. And the odd hour or 10 of lesson planning, of course.

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