a They will have to play in skirts and sandals b If they lose they will be thrown to the lions c If they lose Crowe will throw telephones at them d If they lose lions will throw telephones at them

2 According to Rupert Murdoch, Tony Blair has accused the BBC of hating the United States. What does he want to do?

a Throw the BBC to the lions b Throw the BBC to Russell Crowe c Throw the BBC to Rupert Murdoch d Throw Rupert Murdoch to Russell Crowe

3 According to a new report, teachers laugh out loud every seven minutes.

Why is this?

a They are happy b They are mad c They keep thinking of something Ruth Kelly said d Russell Crowe is standing behind them with a telephone

4 It was recently claimed that David Blunkett intervened over his son’s A-level results when he was education secretary. What is this?

a An outrageous defamation of the character of a political giant of unimpeachable integrity b Another shabby affair from that bloke who fast-tracked his ex-lover’s nanny’s visa c All the fault of the BBC d A malicious rumour started by a lion with a telephone

5 The NUT has produced a new document, Learning to Behave, to help combat unruly behaviour. Who should receive a copy?

a Russell Crowe b David Blunkett c The BBC d Lions with telephones

Answers: 1c, 2b, 3c, 4d, 5b