highlights?

a

b

c

d All of the above

2 Primary-school children need to read only 100 words, according to a

survey. What do the children say?

a Huh?

b Mummy, I’m being severely patronised. Pray make them desist forthwith

c Nothing. I want to be Harold Pinter when I grow up

d *****. And spell it any way you like

3 Residents of a valley in Wales finally got electricity. What did they

see?

a Coronation Street

b Rain

c Hollyoaks

d More rain

4 Paul Gascoigne was sacked as manager of Kettering Town after only 39

days. What should he do now?

a Retire gracelessly

b Learn some new words - triple figures can’t be far off now

c Go to Wales and see the light

d Just go away. Anywhere. Please

5 Another survey has found that Sod’s Law really exists, and it happens on

Mondays. What will happen next Monday?

a Ruth Kelly will pay a surprise visit to constantly drive up standards

b Paul Gascoigne will land butter-side down on the carpet

c It will rain in Wales and cause a power cut

d Bob Geldof will sing about it

Answers

1c, 2d, 3a, 4d, 5b