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- You try to indulge in sleeping in but your internal clock wakes you up at 5am and after a year of training at this ungodly hour, it steadfastly refuses to let you sink back into slumber
- You suddenly remember it would have been be your day to supervise at recess (it's raining).
- Now that you have free time, you're catching up with your favorite teaching blogs and websites.
- You are surprised when the "assembly instructions" for your newest Ikea furntiure are about building something rather than being a list of announcements and some motivational messages.
- If you do make it out of your front door, you refuse to shop anywhere that has any kind of school ad. Or reminds you of school. At all.
- You buy a jumbo pack of dry erase markers "as a treat", despite the fact you don't have a dry erase board at home.
- You finally get a chance to go to your book club but you know with absolute certainty that the meeting is 90% longer than it needs to be.
- You attack the most irksome person at book group for reminding you of that administrator you always clash with.
- You get an email about professional development in July and vow not to open your laptop for another month.
- You have an urge to whip out a red pen and correct all the spelling and grammar mistakes you see while on vacation.
- Any minor disagreement with your partner devolves into the silent treatment when they tell you not to use your teacher voice on them. (Even though they totally started it.)
- Being away from the clasroom makes you think of field trips.
- On your return home from vacation, you inevitably come back with a few knick-knacks that will be "good for school".
- The day before you're back in school, you pray for the almighty disruption of a snow day. Yes, it could happen if you wish hard enough!
- Deep down, you know that this list would have offered a more diverse learning experience if it had been presented as a mind map.
Alison Mitchell was talking to Nicola Davison. She has been a secondary science teacher and mentor in schools for almost 40 years. Now on the road to retirement, she has always tried to find the funny side of this strange and wonderful profession.