This term, we’re on non-fiction; the unwelcome but unavoidable turd of the English curriculum.

Nobody was ever moved or inspired in a lesson about a banal beach-safety leaflet or the smug autobiography of some toff mountain climber.

However, if we at least cover non-fiction in the GCSE, we can continue to fend off the functionalists who would reduce our subject to the composition of emails and instruction manuals. So, this term, I wanted to make the best of it and start off with something relatable: poo.

My inspiration was the dumbfoundingly hilarious infomercial for the Squatty Potty, a stool that turns your toilet posture into a squat; aiding discharge. Apparently.

The video features a super-cute unicorn pooping rainbow ice cream and uses this image as an unexpectedly effective analogy to explain the product. “Yep. It’s a real thing,” I repeatedly assured my students. Having been half-asleep on the first day back after the holiday, some were now staring wide-eyed and mouth agape, wondering what the shiitake was going on. My classes on the second day were wide awake and it was an armageddon of puns and unappetising anecdotes.

There’s an unfortunate trend in education discourse to pooh-pooh anyone suggesting that we should design lessons that are fun and engaging.

However, swinging to the other extreme too easily validates putting zero thought into the materials we use with our learners . It is part of our job to help students to connect with our subject. For resit teachers, it’s the most important part. Non-fiction doesn’t have to be so shit.

Andrew Otty leads 16-19 English in an FE college. He is an ambassador for education charity Shine