When I was on maternity leave after the birth of my first daughter, my biggest concern about returning to work was whether or not I would fit back into my old work wardrobe. I was more worried about having to replace my red pencil skirt than I was about fitting in time to get the red pen out.

Of course I would fit it all in…we always do, right?

Wrong. I returned mid-year, in time for key stage 3 data drop, KS5 coursework and a new specification.

And my adorable child who slept through the night? Two words: sleep regression.

It all came to an explosive head when, during a 5am marking session, my daughter got hold of my marking stamp and attacked the essays. The ones I had already marked. It was A-level marking with annotations on every single paragraph.

Something had to change. This just wasn’t working.

This is a problem that working parents face: fitting it all in. We’re living inside that twisted paradox of being expected to work like we are not parents and parent like we don’t work. On my first day back at school, the first question I was asked by everyone - from dinner ladies to deputy heads - was: “…and who is looking after her now?” Even simple questions can feel like judgements.

However, judgement was the least of my problems. The new challenge was to mark, plan and create resources…but do all of this with small people in tow. With their unpredictability, small people add a unique challenge to the necessity for your family structure to tesselate with your work.

These problems can have an impact equally on both men and women, but the Department for Education’s Database of Teacher Records show that about 27 per cent of teachers who left the profession in 2013 were women aged between 30 and 39. That’s 6,000 women. That is a lot of talent to lose.

If you are back to work this week after paternity or maternity leave or currently planning this leave - or if you are simply struggling still to balance home and work - what I have learned is that routine is the route to salvation.

As soon as I devised and implemented a routine, my life - and that of my family - got easier. I am not going to use the loaded phrase “work smart” , but repetition and systems can make better use of your time.

So here’s Mrs Hallahan’s Guide to Coping with Working Plus Children and Not Tearing Your Hair Out…

1. Make the most of your phone

Creating documents can be done very simply on your phone. More importantly, it can be done anywhere. However, this one comes with a warning: don’t become a prisoner to your planning. Keep track of your time and don’t get drawn into work emails when you had planned to ignore them.

Sync your documents using a cloud-based storage system such as iCloud. Then you can work on them no matter where you are. This means that when you inevitably get a call from the nursery or childminder to say you need to pick up your child right now because the first chicken pox spots have appeared, there are no memory sticks to corrupt and no hard drive to mislay.

2. Set the tone with mornings

As a family, you must work out what your non-negotiable points are. For some families that might be eating together, others might prioritise a half-decent wake-up time. Once you know this, the rest is a matter of prepping.

Prep like you think the apocalypse is coming, because at 7.15am - when you have to leave and you’re one sock and two water bottles down - you will welcome the apocalypse. Clothes for the week are planned on Sunday afternoon and bagged up, so each morning a bag is grabbed and a child dressed.

Everyone needs to “lean in” for mornings to go off well. I would strongly recommend discussing the plan for the morning before maternity leave ends to make the transition back to work as trauma-free as possible for everyone. Setting out expectations and assigning roles early on will make for easier mornings later.

3. Anticipate marking woes

Before children, I had a semi-relaxed attitude to marking. Life after children - “AC”, if you will - has resulted in the worship of the data calendar. On your first day back, follow these simple steps:

• Enter the data collection dates into your planner.
• Work backwards to figure out when the assessment needs to be done.
• Add a few days onto that. Because: life.
• Now work out what dates you need to mark books on in the lead up to that.

Write the schedule on your white board and keep it there. If you don’t keep the same room, stick it onto your planner. This is your bible.

The other thing I do is stupidly simple: students hand in books open on the page that needs marking. You’re welcome: if you weren’t already doing this, then I’ve just given you hours of your life back.

Following stampgate, I stopped bringing work home to mark. I planned at home, marked at work. This might work for you - and may stop the destruction of books by inventive toddlers.

4. Realise sharing is caring

Make the most of social media. Twitter and Facebook are full of kind teachers sharing their resources. Get involved and find your subject area or key stage and get sharing.

5. Pick your childcare carefully

Ask around in the staffroom for tips on what childcare options other people use. Personal recommendations will be the best way to find the right provider for you. The two most important considerations will be: proximity to your school versus home and if there is a retainer charge for the holidays.

Although this may come across as overly negative, there are positives. Becoming a parent can prepare you for teaching in weird and wonderful ways.

Watching Frozen on a loop during potty training is the best preparation for dealing with Year 9 period five on a Friday. I can smile through anything now.

Grainne Hallahan has been teaching English in Essex for 10 years