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The bottom inspectors

And now some advice from our inspectors: "Don't drink tea while you teach," "Don't sit on the table" and "Smile more."

All of these are reported as genuine Ofsted feedback in the TES's online staffroom (www.tes.co.ukstaffroom). But our favourite is: "My wife was told to wear a jumper to cover her bottom if she was going to wear trousers." If she wasn't going to wear trousers, we assume the jumper became even more vital.

Most mysterious, was this: "In some classrooms, the necessity for additional roof supports hinders pupils' progress." Because they need to keep one hand free to hold up the roof, perhaps?

Email us diary@tes.co.uk

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