I was glad to see TES tackling the subject of sex and relationship education in the light of abstinence (“The new puritans”, 11 May). I work in schools and colleges in East London and have learned from young people that they would like more time to discuss the topic of relationships. I work with faith leaders, some of whom bury their heads in the sand and imagine that none of their young people are sexually active. On the other hand, many service providers don’t seem to think that there are any young people who want to wait until they are married before they have sex. However, I come across many young people who do want to wait. Surely they should be supported in this choice and not told that it is “not terribly realistic”. Even (first) sex that is “anxious and brief” can be special if it is with the right person at the right time in the right place for that couple.

Finally, I was concerned about the continued use, in both the article and the editor’s comment, of the phrase “safe sex”. Even my Year 10s understand that there is no such thing as “safe sex”, only “safer sex”.

Jo Sell, NewISH and the FRYP website.