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Keep your clothes on

Revelation upon revelation. We have unearthed a Scottish connection to the hot movie Calendar Girls, the quintessential light English comedy about the Women's Institute members in Yorkshire who unrobed - in the best possible taste - as a fundraiser.

Step forward, fully attired, Eleanor Coner, chair of the Scottish Parent Teacher Council. Turns out her auntie was in fact Mrs January. But this is where the story becomes complicated.

For reasons known only to the film-makers, Mrs January in the film was none other than Helen Mirren, who is called Chris but is actually Pat (are you still with us?).

Eleanor's aunt was played by Annette Crosbie, again with a name change. And for good measure, actress Crosbie - better half of Victor Meldrew - in real life went to Boroughmuir High in Edinburgh. A former school board chair of Boroughmuir High is Judith Gillespie, development manager of none other than the SPTC. (Still with us?) We can assure nervous readers that the SPTC is unlikely to follow the calendar girls, even as a PTA fundraiser.

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