This week: the school run

Primary teachers everywhere are involved in the vital business of imparting social mores to the youngest members of society, who have too little life experience to be aware of the importance of taking turns, conceding graciously and not pushing in or shouting at others.

But what to do when it is the parents who start squabbling?

According to a survey released this week - admittedly carried out by an insurance company - as many as 75 per cent of the 1,000 people polled have seen other drivers behaving badly over parking spaces during the school run.

This is a prime time for tension. And us telling parents to allow extra time in the winter, park further from the school gates, walk to school or arrive in cars rather than vehicles fortified for use in war zones is only likely to add to that tension.

But let’s do it anyway. It is, after all, teachers who have to share the classroom with students after they’ve been chucked out of the back of the Hummer with curses ringing in their ears.

So, parents who behave badly on the school run, prepare for a spell on the naughty step. And don’t worry, we’ve reserved a space for all of you.