One of the most perennially popular strings in the TES Connect chatroom features the funniest things pupils have said to teachers. There are some real corkers.

Take this one, from a pupil studying biology: “I think gender is an inherited characteristic. Oh, but it could be environmental because sometimes people have an operation to change into a woman ... I think it’s called a blow job”.

Here is another excellent contribution: “We were discussing the nativity with a Year 1 class and we talked about the kings bringing baby Jesus gold as a gift.

“One little love voiced his concern that Jesus was a ‘chav’. When asked why he thought this, he replied: ‘My mum said it’s only chavs kids that wear gold, so he must be a real chav if he gets it when he has just been born.’”

And one more contribution for luck: “On a recent visit to the local cathedral, we were being shown around by a charming old gent. One of the kids sidled up to me and whispered, ‘Miss, so is he the Pope then?’”