1 Who sought sanctuary in a hotel room after announcing that we are living in a post-Christian society?

2 What brought some headteachers to their knees?

3 Who proved himself worth a 34 per cent pay rise?

4 Which mums and dads were accused of running up high hotel bills and big expenses?

5 Who said seven times eight was 54 and got a job in the Treasury?

6 Why was the Qualifications and Curriculum Authority spooked by its move to new offices?

7 Who is known as “two-brains”? And who was his predecessor - the “invisible man”?

8 Who shut an open door for working mums and part-time students?

9 Who was rattled over cuts to the arts?

10 Who says female primary teachers are soft and cuddly?

11 Who found having a drink in the Queen Vic a novel experience?

12 Which football-mad minister wants to play on David Blunkett’s team?

13 Who was saddened that the Catholic upper classes send their sons to Eton?

14 Who are the “miserable sods”?

15 Where was an Essex girl not welcome?

16 Who has turned his attention from good English to foreign languages?

17 The Office for Standards in Education spent pound;1,500 inspecting the school this boy attended. Who is he and where is his school? Photograph by North News.

ANSWERS

1 Government adviser Michael Barber. He was pursued by journalists after his speech to the Secondary Heads Association.

2 Heads were awarded Dame and Knighthoods in the New Year’s Honours list.

3 Chris Woodhead, the chief inspector, who is paid a basic salary of pound;115,000 with the possibility of a bonus of up to 10 per cent.

4 The National Confederation of Parent Teacher Associations which was subjected to a highly-critical Charity Commission investigation.

5 Stephen Byers, the former schools standards minister who is now chief secretary of the Treasury.

6 Because it took over the former MI6 headquarters.

7 David Willetts, the Tory education spokesman. His predecessor Stephen Dorrell, was heard from only rarely.

8 The Open University which suspended its part-time, distance-learning course for primary teacher training.

9 Conductor Sir Simon Rattle who is a member of the Department for Education and Employment’s national advisory committee on creative and cultural education.

10 Men, according to the Sara Eden Introductions dating agency.

11 Education Secretary David Blunkett who launched The National Year of Reading on the ‘EastEnders’ set.

12 Sports minister Tony Banks who thinks sport should come under the remit of the Department for Education and Employment.

13 Father Leo Chamberlain, headteacher of Ampleforth College, the “Catholic Eton”.

14 The Sneering Cynics in the staffroom, attacked by David Blunkett for failing to applaud government initiatives.

15 Trinity College Cambridge, where admissions tutor Dr Eric Griffiths sneered at an interviewee for her estuary English.

16 Newscaster and champion of good spoken English, Trevor McDonald who now heads the Nuffield inquiry into foreign language learning.

17 Tom Fosten was the only part-time pupil at Holy Island School, Lindisfarne - he attended when the tide cut him off from the mainland.

18 OFSTED calls its system for assessing schools the PANDA or Performance and Assessment measure.

19 Edison, the US company, which wants to run an education action zone.

20 Sir Terence Conran, one of a number of designers and architects involved in a staffroom of the future competition.