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* A dinner lady told me that a Year 1 boy in my class wasn't eating his packed lunch and hadn't done for a few days. I asked him the usual questions. "Don't you like ham rolls?" "Have you got tummy ache?" "Why aren't you eating your lunch?" His eyes welled up and in a sincere voice he said: "I just don't want to grow up."


* Working with a Year 5 class, I was asked if I knew the "police alphabet". The group on that table knew some of the letters - A = Alpha, F = Foxtrt, T = Tango - from watching episodes of The Bill, but didn't know the whole alphabet. "OK..." I said, "A = alpha, B = bravo, C = charlie, D = " "Dimmock," yelled one bright spark.


* When teaching my Year 6 class about food chains, we debated whether tadpoles were herbivores or not. I pointed out that they sometimes ate each other and asked: "What do you call it when an animal eats one of its own kind?" One hand shot up: "A traitor."


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