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Sweet talk

Alan Smith, president of the Scottish School Board Association, had just ended a somewhat frenetic presentation of the SSBA response to the Banks report at its recent conference, which left his audience marvelling at the man's energy levels.

He finished with a climactic flourish: "Right, questions?" Before anyone had time to draw breath or marshal a thought, a woman in the front row immediately hit him with: "Are you on blue Smarties or something, 'cos you're buzzin'?" Exit the gravitas.

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