Bad dogs and Scottishmen go out

17th December 2004 at 00:00
Deep in darkest Glasgow, an attendance officer and a deputy head ventured into a block of flats to speak to a family about their daughter's poor attendance. As they climbed the stairs they spotted a large, slavering rottweiler patrolling the landing outside the flat they were supposed to visit.

Summoning all their professionalism, they tiptoed around the beast and rang the bell. The door was opened and the dog rushed in.

Once inside, they were greeted by the child's mother and taken into a barely-furnished living room. The conversation did not go well. As tempers frayed, the deputy head saw the pooch cock its leg and pee against a wall.

Nobody said anything. The discussion became even more heated and the deputy then saw the hound crouch and poo in the corner. Again, nothing was said.

Eventually, the attendance officer decided to end the hostile meeting. As he and his deputy left and began to walk downstairs, the flat door was thrown open again and the father shouted: " An' youse can take yer dog wae yeh!"

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