With the first freeze round the corner - global warming permitting - a primary heidie recalls a morning when the playground was decked in the white stuff. He was there early to prevent any incidents but was surprised to see one of his usual suspects, never likely to be Oxbridge material, with his tousers soaked through.
"Have you wet yourself?" he gently inquired.
"Have you fallen?"
"So how come your trousers are soaking?"
The lad confided quietly, revealing his mastery of 5-14 science: "Ah've goat a snowball in ma pocket for the brek."