Come in 42, your time's up

6th May 2005 at 01:00
Capitalising on the new series of Dr Who, a London secondary has come up with a winning job ad: "Time Lord required to teach history, government and politics." But imagine the consequences if St Augustine's Priory appointed the good doctor. The Tardis might get the school trip to Skyro okay. But would it arrive back in time for pottery? Then there is the criminal record assessment. Which of his eight reincarnations need checking? Furthermore, would he make history so popular that every child would want to teach it? History is one subject that isn't short of teachers.

On second thoughts, perhaps the school should seek its next historian from The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy. Marvin the Paranoid Android would fit the bill. You can hear him complaining: "Brain the size of a planet and they put me in charge of 3b!"

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