Dealing with anger;Bullying;Features amp; Arts

5th November 1999 at 00:00
Object: to help bullies and victims think about constructive ways to deal with anger Time: 20 minutes Materials: paper and pens Ask the participants to break into small groups. Ask the groups to brainstorm and come up with a list of answers to the following questions. Also listed here are suggestions that Kidscape groups have put together in case you need some "trigger" statements, which you may or may not agree with.

DEALING WITH ANGER

Why do people get angry?

* Because they don't get what they want. * Because they are frustrated. * Because they cannot do their school work. * Because they are hurt and afraid to show it. * Because they feel hard done by. * Because they feel frightened or inadequate. * Because they are being abused and can't tell. * Because they are used to getting their own way. When is anger OK?

* If something is unfair. * If someone is being harmed. * If dictators are killing people. * If someone is being bullied. * If someone is being called racist names. * If people have been abused. When is anger not OK?

* If it is used to hurt someone. * If it is used unfairly. * If it is used to gain power over someone. * If it makes you sick. * If it is turned against yourself. How can anger be expressed?

* State the reasons for your anger calmly and be specific: "I'm angry because you didn't meet me at the cinema like you promised".

* State what you would like to happen to remedy the situation: "You owe me an apology" or "I expect you to replace the toy you broke".

* Listen to what the other person says without interrupting.

* Stick to the current problem. Don't bring up all the sins of the past, such as "You're always doing that".

* Try not to use blame. It's better to say "It makes me angry when you take my video game without asking", not "You're a terrible person for taking my game and I hate you".

This exercise is taken from theKidscape training manual 'How to Stop Bullying'. See details on page 7

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