Growing in maturity
Teenagers are forever saying they want to be treated like adults. In practice, this means they want sex and booze rather than the more archetypal adult activity of a soul-crushing commute to a dull job.
So the findings of Roger Morgan, the Government's children's rights director, on teenagers' views about living at a residential FE college come as no surprise. One, in a succinct masterpiece of eloquence, simply wrote: "It's fucking awful." But the rest were mostly positive, and just wanted some freedoms.
"I think you should be more lenient on rules and drinking and curfews," one said. Another asked: "Why are under-18 boys and girls not allowed in each others' hostels? It makes no difference how old you are as to how you would act. That's down to an individual's personality. Over-18s can go in friends' rooms. Why can't we?"
Dr Morgan innocently concludes that male and female students want to "interact" more. No doubt they do, which is why colleges find it so necessary to keep them apart.
You only live twice
News of Carlisle College's involvement in the world's first James Bond museum - it has made a film about the museum's creator, Peter Nelson - alerts FErret to an inspiring story of lifelong learning.
Mr Nelson, 48, became a devotee of the secret agent as a teenager. "Peter Nelson didn't become a secret agent - instead he took up a career as a dentist," as the local News amp; Star put it.
But in realising his dream of a home to show off his memorabilia - including the submersible Lotus Esprit from The Spy Who Loved Me - he had to learn to be a painter, joiner, carpet fitter and electrician to kit out the museum by himself. And when he acquired the 42-ton Russian tank driven by Bond in GoldenEye, he felt obliged to learn how to drive it. "It turned out to be surprisingly easy," he said, "although it is unforgiving, and if you hit anything, you demolish it!"
Located on the site of a former supermarket, you can find Keswick's latest tourist attraction behind the Cumberland Pencil Museum. 007 would be proud.