THE START of the school summer holidays means one thing here at The TES: the annual rubbish presents rundown. Yes, you have been hitting the website forums to moan about the gaudy, tacky and cheap gifts purchased by your charges to celebrate the end of the year.
What an ungrateful lot. As school doors have swung shut around the country, so have your hearts.
"Not that I'm a grasping bint," writes one poster on our website "but not one bottle of wine!! Eight bunches of crappy flowers picked hurriedly from the next door neighbour's garden ... and worst of all ... the child from Hell who I have taught for two straight years (and only his guardian angel could have kept my hands from throttling him many times)... gives me a framed photo of him!! I never want to set eyes on the bleeder again and he gives me a photo!!"
Oh yes, multiple exclamation mark user, we feel your pain.
"Best teacher" mugs and teddies came in for maximum scorn. But some of you, thankfully, were touched.
"I got some stunning presents, lovely jewellery, Gordon Ramsay chocolates and Chateau Neuf de Pape," wrote one poster. Quick, tell us where you're teaching!