Online opinion

19th April 2013 at 01:00
Thatcher: the greatest human ever?

Please can we acknowledge Margaret Thatcher as the greatest human being ever to have graced the planet with her glorious presence? It's a sad day when a person of her stature is not accorded the recognition she deserves.


- ROFL (rolling on floor laughing).


- Whatever you say about her, it must have been tough being the only woman in the cabinet, what with having nobody to accompany her to the toilet.


- Well, unlike some of her predecessors, at least she didn't wet herself before getting there whenever the unions raised their ugly heads.


- I think champagne is called for.


- Brown ale, surely? The working class cannot afford champagne.


- I'm not sure she'll be able to drink anything when she's dead. Maybe some milk if that isn't wasteful?


- Trouble is, there's many a working-class guy in the South East who bought his house for #163;8,000 under Thatcher and is now sitting in a property worth half a million.


- Meanwhile, as a result of there being too few council properties, people with a spare bedroom are having their housing benefit cut and there's nowhere for them to move into. And as a result of the massive house price inflation that ensued, many people are sitting in properties worth less than they paid for them and too many first-time buyers can't get a mortgage.


- I thought the Emperor Hadrian might be in the running. Thatcher is actually pretty lacklustre in any sort of historical context.


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