Soundbites

1st December 2000 at 00:00
Year 7 were learning about the Earth's resources. I showed them three pictures - the sea full of fish, material being blasted out of a quarry and a forest being cut down by men with chainsaws.

Question: "Which of these is a renewable resource?" Answer: "The chainsaw."

DEBBIE WEST * During a key stage 3 assembly on the theme of responsibility, the head talked about the difference between reasons and excuses. He then asked any student who had been late that morning to explain why. Quick as a flash one hand went up. "It was my turn o walk the tortoise this morning, Sir."

NICKI LEGGATT * My niece attended a Catholic primary school where one day the teacher was going over the details of Jesus's life.

"Who can tell me the name of Jesus's stepfather on Earth?" "Joseph."

"Excellent. Now who can tell me what Joseph did for a living?" "I can, Miss. He was a carpainter."

KEVIN FITZSIMONS

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