* I was asking a pupil what 17 divided by two was equal to. She shrugged her shoulders and so, using cubes, we divided the 17 into two groups of eight and found that we had one left over. I asked her what we would do with this one cube. "Eat it," came the reply.
* In a literacy lesson, Year 6 were rewriting a passage about barn owls. During my marking of the subsequent texts, I found out that barn owls look for mice and voels while they are hoovering by the side of the motorway.
* A letter: "Mark does not have any swimming trunks. Unfortunately his shape does not lend itself to this garment. It is most embarrassing for him as his privates fall out both sides. He cannot be put through the embarrassment of wearing them in front of the school and I am sure the school would not want to see him displayed in this way."