Staffroom Stereotypes - Which type are you?

22nd November 2013 at 00:00

Professional development is a journey of self-discovery. To help you along the way, TES is offering an ever so slightly tongue-in-cheek series of questions that will uncover who you really are. Supportive colleague or anxious newbie? Passionate part-timer or management material? Log on to www.tesconnect.comquiz to find out the truth.

But before you bare your soul, do you recognise this aspirational lady?

Driven Diana

Driven Diana and her common-law partner, Driven Dave, are in competition: the last one to become headteacher has to abandon his or her own career and pledge complete subservience to their other half.

It's BBC soap Waterloo Road meets Hollywood blockbuster True Lies.

To date, it's looking good for Diana. Adorned in her criticism-resistant pinstriped power suit, she is climbing that promotion ladder fast. Having blasted through every "exciting" working party, mentor programme and curriculum initiative under the pedagogic sun, Super-Di zaps anyone who questions her methodology with the impressive clutch of letters after her name.

Diana has even turned the brief setback of giving birth to her advantage: it has enabled her to whittle down the amount of sleep she requires to four hours. She has also developed extreme multitasking skills and is able to lead a senior leadership team chat on Twitter while doing 40 minutes on the cross-trainer. Super-Di has the incredible capacity to walk, drink coffee from one of those too-busy-to-sit-down thermal mugs and pick at a Graze box, all while interviewing the school's student ambassadors for learning about which of her colleagues' lessons they find the most educationally stimulating.

Our fearless facilitator is forever on the move, energised by a lunchtime jog or gym session. It is not unusual to find her sprinting across the school car park clutching her iPad, breathing "Walk with me!" to a gaggle of learning ambassadors, all eager for her attention.

Meanwhile, stunned colleagues, faced with her perma-smile and "just a cheeky request" for "one small favour" can do nothing but slowly creep backwards towards the edge of a large cliff.

Resistance, as they say, is futile.

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