I have been contacted by a wag (of the non football-related type) at the National Research and Development Centre for Adult Literacy and Numeracy.
He has done some digging into the organisation's web traffic, having become strangely curious to know which search phrases were being used by people who ended up on its website.
It seems the terms that bring you unexpectedly to the organisation's door include: "How to talk gangsta language"; "Presentation on how to make a good cup of tea"; "Chip pan fire pictures"; "15 biscuits"; and, my favourite: "Research on chocolate stopping street crime caused by drinking."
Sadly, I regret to say that none of these is covered by the researchers'
work to date, but if they find out how to make a decent cuppa, they're welcome to come and work as FErret's apprentice.