TES Forums - What would you do with an hour on the plinth?

10th July 2009 at 01:00


Marking. You think I have time for anything else?


I would instead occupy an empty stool in some pub round the corner - my art work demonstrating the sense of displacement so many of us feel in these strange times, a sense which we attempt to obliterate by getting drunk and behaving with a careless lack of decorum in public places.


I would stand with my hand shielding my eyes as I look wistfully off into the distance. The title of my work would be 'Some day my plinth will come'.


Mrs F and I are on the list. We failed to get a place on the first selection, but there will be more chances. I have no idea what I will do if I get up there.


Remember my brolly. Those pigeons now have laser-guided guano. I would dress as a giant pigeon - and take a supersoaker charged with guano-like fluid with which to take pot shots at the real pigeons.


I'd like to sit up there on a deck chair with a good book. In fact, I could do more than one hour if the book was particularly good ...


I would sit up there and quietly do the crossword and not frighten anyone.

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