That venerable North Lanarkshire councillor, Gordon Murray, SNP tribune of the republic of Cumbernauld, could never be accused of neglecting his people.
At last week's education committee, he covered an impressive range of topics. Pre-five provision in Cumbernauld (or lack of it, said Murray) was followed by primary school funding and the scandalously neglected issue of the supply of free school ties in what's it called - oh yes, Cumbernauld.
Alas for Murray, some f his people were not prepared to be tied and Michael O'Neill, the director of education, informed him that parents at one of the new amalgamated Cumbernauld schools in question opted for open collars.
Teachers' rep Wolseley Brown, who knows a thing or two about exotic neckwear, told Murray gently that his proposal for free ties was "drivel". Brown added gnomically:
"It is an indisputable fact that children grow up."
But not if they are cooncillors.